what lesson does kawa have for us about life?

issue 61 ♡ lessons of grief & loss from my angel daughter. when treasure can be found through trauma & tumultuous tidal waves.

Jul 20, 2024

heart beats on. live-r lives on. kidneys kid on ♡ words & pictures by dee kawai tang

what lesson does kawa have for us about life? love lou lunchlady, federal, australia.

dear lou & lunch ladies

this tuesday is kawa angel day — the day we recognise that our firstborn daughter kawa passed away. in honour of her, this weeks post and next will be dedicated to grief. i share a story of our last day with kawa from my earth-bound lens in part I and then tune into my higher self through meditation in part II to channel what lessons kawa came to teach us.

this newsletter expands further from issue 9 the one on angels and issue 15 the one on grief. kindly note that god can be substituted for any vernacular or venerable you prefer and heaven for the etheric realm that resonates with you.

part I.

accepting that your daughter is dead is the hardest truth i have ever swallowed. however in those same moments, giving away her organs was the easiest decision i have ever made. when we found out kawa’s brain had not survived and the life support machine was keeping only her physical body alive, they asked if we would donate her healthy vital organs. her heart had been resuscitated, alive and beating on. we ticked the yes box immediately.

in my own broken heart, i knew kawa had left days ago, her soul had departed earth immediately. i knew she would want to give it all away. “here, take it”, i could hear her say. “here, have it. i don’t need this any more!”, as she handed over her heart, kidneys and liver — giving away her chi, life force and beating organs with a divine smile.

her organs were removed in the night and swiftly transported across the country to their new bodies and eagerly waiting recipients. from what they could tell us, her heart was placed in a one year old child and her kidneys given to a middle aged woman who had been dependent on dialysis. they switched off her life support machine. she was laid on a heated bed to keep her still little body warm.

we had one more day to spend with kawa’s physical-ship that she once embodied. i was barely in my own body. however in a lucid state of strange grief, i saw flowers strewn all around her room. i found myself gravitating towards the bunches and began pulling out stems unwittingly, plucking flowers and placing them around kawa — as if i had done this many lifetimes before.

i tucked sunflowers behind her ears. i placed daises and carnations around the crown of her sweet head. i dressed her in her fave flea market floral dress. we tied her cape littered with stars around her neck with little peach berries in the knot. i tucked waddles the penguin under her arm and pink and white roses onto her now concave chest.

as family and friends came in, they followed suit. without a word spoken, we became transfixed in this spontaneous ritual of creation and honour. a mosaic of petals and peonies covered her body with little heart shaped leaves emanating around her entire being. nurses and doctors came in to check on her. they gasped at the sight of her. she was the most exquisite thing we had ever seen. this was the last day we spent with kawa’s darling incarnation that lived 1369 glorious days on earth.

part II.

kawa came to earth to show people how to live simply and with joy and gratitude for the little things in life — which become the big things when you leave. no-one remembers how much money you made or the colour of your skin or what car you drove or how you wore your hair without a care but what is remembered is how you were in the moment with others.

your presence of being truly in the moment, the way your eyes lit up the world and how you smiled with reckless abandon. yes, these things, these aspects are remembered and they resonate still — as star-beings sprinkle their magic dust before they leave earth. many remain unforgettable as their vibration and resonance is so high and vibratory light that exists through eras and eras much like music and art that continues to atonish and waken consciousness.

kawa served on earth for 3.75 years, however she is still bound to earthly duties. her heart beats on and on and on, on earth. the recipients of her organs — her heart, kidneys and live on with apart of her essence within and through her organs she can still feel connected and live on earth in a physical way with a cord connected to her in the heavenly realm.

kawa committed to this incarnation with her mother and father to learn and teach the lesson of grief and loss and what fruit or gifts it can bear, if you ride the gamut and throw caution to the wind and fully sail through trauma and tumultuous tidal waves to land on deserted islands, to find your way to treasure. there is no other way to soul evolution.

she says, we must suffer as souls incarnated here on earth. we must endure and enter the evolutionary track to soul ascension and the only way is taking the highway to hell. however when you have traipsed through hell, it is only then, you live to tell of the trials and tribulations and can see, feel and know what lightness truly is. if you do not understand or withstand darkness, you will never know the true value of lightness and all that it offers to you in this game of light.

understanding the dark, being steeped in shadows teaches you to reach out to grace and faith — friends of suffering. together they work hand in hand, mano-a-mano in a eternal partnership to lead you to the light source.

to summarise what kawa came to teach us — it is that we must be exactly as we were meant and destined to be — and within that, you will feel and understand true freedom. love is always here and will hold your hand for the entire duration of your earth bound ride.

god/buddha speed.

love d(oris) & kawa xxx

ps. love your mama.